By Bill Foley
Five days before the Packers and Patriots are set to meet in a Sunday night showdown, Aaron Rodgers stole a page from Tom Brady’s playbook.
The unhappy quarterback sent a boob of a teammate packing.
Rodgers traded Ty Montgomery to the Ravens for a seventh-round pick. The move came two days after Montgomery’s fumble cost the Packers a chance to beat the Rams in Los Angeles.
Technically, it was Packers general manager Brian Gutekunst who filled out the paper work to send the Montgomery to the slumping Ravens. But c’mon. We all know it was Rodgers who sent away the goat from Green Bay’s latest loss.
Did you see the way Rodgers was storming around and pouting on the sideline after Montgomery fumbled the ball on a kick return? He wanted Montgomery gone.
The fumble, after all, robbed Rodgers of a chance drive down and beat the Rams, which he almost certainly would have done.
Instead, the Rams won 29-27 in front of an L.A. Coliseum crowd that was full of Cheeseheads.
(Note: Don’t put cheese on your head. Even if it is fake, it is weird.)
The trade of Montgomery is eerily similar to a 2006 trade Brady and the Patriots made after a New England player drew a costly penalty for excessive celebration following a touchdown.
Brady was offended by the me-first actions of his teammate, and, as a punishment, he traded Peter Griffin to the London Silly Nannies.
Rodgers clearly saw that episode of the Family Guy and took it to heart.
London doesn’t have a team — yet — so Baltimore was the next best place to exile a bad teammate.
The Montgomery trade comes after some anonymous Packers players threw their now former teammate directly under the bus.
Sure, we already knew that Montgomery cost the team the win. The nameless players made it even look worse by tattling to the press that interim Packers coach Mike McCarthy instructed Montgomery to take a knee in the end zone on the kickoff.
Instead, Montgomery caught the ball about two yards into the end zone, ran out and fumbled the game to the Rams.
The nameless players made it sound as if a disgruntled Montgomery purposely cost the team the win because he was mad about his diminishing role in the Green Bay offense. If this is indeed true, then Montgomery just became my all-time favorite Packer.
Montgomery said he wasn’t sure of exactly where he was at, and he didn’t want to take a knee just outside the goal line. That would have been bad. Oh, it wouldn’t have been as bad as fumbling, but it would have been nonetheless.
If nothing else, the play and its aftermath gave us all a glimpse inside a ship that is sinking fast. Teams that aren’t quickly going under don’t generally air their dirty laundry for all the world to see.
Instead, good teammates pick their fallen brother up publicly while they flog him in the private confines of the locker room.
The same day the Packers traded Montgomery, they also sent young safety Ha’Sean Treshon “Ha Ha” Clinton-Dix to the Redskins, even though Ha Ha Clinton-Dix appeared to be trying to win.
That is a shame because saying “Ha Ha Clinton-Dix” was the only likable thing about that team from Green Bay. Now there is nothing to like.
Speaking of likeable, last week I was pretty awesome. I posted a 12-2 record straight up. I went 9-5 against the spread. It was by far my best week of the season.
My best pick was taking the Rams to win but the Packers to cover. I owe that all to Ty Montgomery and a heads-up play by Todd Gurley, who angered countless gamblers and fantasy geeks by purposely stopping short of the end zone in the final seconds.
On the season I am now 71-50 straight up and 51-69-1 against the spread.
Following are my Week 9 picks. The lines are from ESPN, the Network that had a field day with Green Bay’s latest soap opera.
Oakland (plus 3) at San Francisco
Why in the world would anybody watch this game?
49ers by 1
Chicago (minus 10) at Buffalo
The Bears would never be 10-point road favorites over the Bills if Colt Anderson was still in Buffalo.
Bears by 17
Kansas City (minus 8) at Cleveland
Browns owner Jimmy Haslam fired head coach Hue Jackson after a 2-5-1 start. In 40 games with Jackson at the helm, the Browns went 3-36-1.
I’ll fact check this later, but I believe that makes Jackson Cleveland’s all-time winningest coach.
Lock this one up.
Chefs by 92
New York Jets (plus 3) at Miami
Dolphins quarterback Brock Osweiler, a Kalispell native, will once again get the start for the Dolphins. It’s worth noting again that Osweiler is 3-0 all time as a starter against the Bears. He is 12-15 against the rest of the league.
Somebody tell him he’s playing the Bears.
Dolphins by 6
Detroit (plus 4.5) at Minnesota
The Lions got ready for the matchup with a divisional rival by trading their top receiver, Golden Tate.
Matthew Safford must be a Family Guy fan, too.
Vikings by 13
Atlanta (plus 1.5) at Washington
New Washington safety Ha Ha Clinton-Dix probably won’t figure into this game. I just wanted to type his name one more time.
Native Americans by 3
Tampa Bay (plus 6) at Carolina
So, four interceptions did to Jameis Winston what credible rape and sexual assault accusations couldn’t. Sent the bum to the bench.
Get ready for “Fitzmagic Time.” Upset.
Bucs by 1
Pittsburgh (plus 3) at Baltimore
Mike Tomlin will put on his best trippin’ shoes for this one.
Steelers by 7
Houston (plus 1) at Denver
The Broncos traded receiver Demaryius Thomas to the Texans five days before they play the Texans?
That doesn’t seem too smart.
Texans by 8
Los Angeles Chargers (plus 1.5) at Seattle
The Seahawks are a two-point loss to the Rams away from a five-game winning streak.
Seahawks by 2
Los Angeles Rams (plus 1.5) at New Orleans
This might end up being the biggest game of the year.
Rams by 4
Green Bay (plus 6) at New England
Don’t let the rings fool you, Rodgers is the best quarterback in this game.
Tom Terrific, though, is clearly the better teammate. He only throws teammates under the bus in cartoons.
Patriots by 10
Tennessee (plus 6) at Dallas
The Cowboys solved their receiving woes by trading a first-round pick for the Raiders’ third-best receiver.
You know you’re a bad general manager when Chucky fleeces you.
Titans by 3
Laughing at the Packers: Bengals, Colts, Giants, Eagles, Cardinals, Jaguars